Me.

I don’t really introduce myself to people in real life. I am that person who would tell you who I am if you really asked, but if you didn’t I would be fine with not mentioning my name, where I’m from, etc… I don’t want you to think I am saying this to act ‘cool’ (idk why that is in air quotes), its just the way I am (also I’m not that cool). Its actually nice getting to know people and having people getting to know me. BuzzFeed already knows me, as they do everyone else on earth. Deny it if you will, but its some sort of statistical sorcery I tell you:

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You guys probably know about how I escape this world accidentally and sometimes purposely. Its through my dreams or lucid dreams (I think I am capable of doing this…its pretty cool). The time I get the perfect dream is in the morning…I wake up at 7:30am when my alarm goes off, use the restroom, and then I go back to sleep because I love the escape. I feel so magical. I then sleep for 2.5hrs and experience the best scenarios, with the same characters or the ones that are obviously the only ones invited. I tweeted this morning right after I woke up from this awesome dream, as most of you DO NOT KNOW, since I only have a lousy 4 fake followers on Twitter, thank you very much (LOL. JK you can follow me if you want, but I am fine with the 4 trolls).

So that is two things about me I wanted to share with you guys today. NOT THAT IT MATTERS (its fun acting salty when you really aren’t. K bye.)

-eva626

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Don’t wake me up.

This is about the dream I had this morning. Ok, this morning because I woke up at 8am to just use the restroom and then went back to sleep for 2 hrs. These were the best two hours.

I was invited to go on a week long family/friends reunion in some country not traveled to by any of my family/friends or me. We were all there. People who didn’t know each other, but people who knew me. There were little cousins, still as young as I remember them 5 yrs ago, and people who I see every so often. Everyone eating their petite appetizers prepared by me in my beautiful kitchen, part of my luxury home that had a patio/deck to an area of water led to by some natural stone steps. This was not even the highlight of this dream. All the little ones were playing, and all the adults were talking.

Even in my own “vacation?” home, I’m guessing thats what this was, since it was somewhere else in the world, where all good things happen OBVIOUSLY, I was still alone. I am alone most of the time and I don’t mind it. It only hurts when I feel lonely. I feel lonely most when I go back to NY, only when I am not around my siblings/parents. Its so sad because I used to love NY. So, I was just trying to be a good host and picking up after people, going into the kitchen and into the living room, back and forth, making sure every thing was intact, not broken, and also tidy. Then everyone just left to go out somewhere. I guess I missed the memo LOL. I was still cleaning and nobody picked up the “dusturkhan” [the sheet or cloth you put on the floor, where we normally eat food together]. So I go and grab the napkin to clean it off. I start the one end that is near the glass door and leads to the patio. Then I make my way to the other end, which is disturbingly more dimmed in lighting, now that I think about it. There is also a curtain on that side of the room. It sounds kinda creepy now. But yea, I do go towards that end and I see that arm [connected to a living person of course LOL. I read that line over and trust me this was not a nightmare. If it was, I would have either died and never woke up {not what I meant in the title of this post btw} or would have woke up asap leading me to not write this post at all].

Oh. That person came to my uncalled-for-reunion and hid from everyone, only to reveal himself to me! Great, people must think I am crazy now again. I move my eyes up to see that face. That smirk. “Hi”. Somehow I end up falling onto this person. I am guessing at this point we have stood up or something. IDK. But, I am a clumsy person in my dreams. I face palmed on to this person’s arm, making contact and I feel a nerve pull back, not from me. Yes, that mystery still has some modesty [insert dapper man with bowtie pretending to hold a plate of hors d’oeuvres up to his shoulders, with one hand]. The feels tho. I can’t explain the rest I don’t want to explain the rest. Anyway. I woke up and it was the worst thing ever. I wish this was real. Then I went to school to study for my final.

-eva626.

Come back, wondering mind.

I had a dream last night…it wasn’t a good dream. It was a worrisome dream. One that makes you stop and think about how I have to grasp reality and let go, since you already let go way before, which honestly kills me.  I was so scared to take a step forward into the past because I thought that it might make me go crazy of how much I want to go back. But, then in this dream, I did and it was like a slap in the face. I wanted this dream to stay a fantasy and one to where I can go and hide in when ever I felt alone or sad, but the dream was actually a wake up call, just call me an oxymoron will ya (get it LOL). For real though, it pulled me in and nothing! Like what, why, I really wish it was something. I wanted it to stay a sweet hiding place but it was rather blah…

Gosh. My escape became as bland as my reality. Thanks, dream you are such a nightmare. (LOL I did it again – not Britney)

-eva626

Useless Dream

I thought that moment passed, forgotten. Nope, just hidden in the back of my mind. “NafsiATi” [mind-related?] I tell you.  I should be freaking out about Finals, cause’ yes, its finals week, hence the distracting-me-getting-on-the-blog-flow. Typical. The dream is kind of fuzzy now, thank God. I woke up in the middle of it and wanted to go back into it. Darn that alarm and school. JK I love the Education, and need that alarm. Alhumdulilah.

It was a Sunrise. Beautiful, I know. Deal with it.

It was a Sunrise. Beautiful, I know. Deal with it.

It was you. Me. and some random girl who was supposedly my younger sister? Like, come on. Get out of my dream, you dweeb. I wanted a younger sister in real life, not in this dream [sure told her HA]. Anyway, it was personal. So close, and personal. Ah. It was…lovely, actually. However, a disappointment upon awakening. You were the same as I knew you, and so was I, except it was a dream and everything was not perfect, but that didn’t matter because we were there. Sticking together till the end. Together. My best friend. Always.

So…you guys want me to write about something specific…I mean if you people still exist. I’ve been so bad at blogging and stuff. Mostly bad at “stuff”. Yea, so tell me! I really want to write at least once a week. Lets see how that goes. BTW, Eid Mubarak?

-eva626