The right vs silence.

I think you people might or might have not noticed that I haven’t written anything in months that some of the posts I wrote from previous time [haha idk whats going on with my verbiage…see] are “protected”. Sounds mysterious huh…well they aren’t. I have decided to protect the posts that revolve around what I am “upto” and my “daily happenings”. But, I will keep my other posts public…you know, like the ones that are helpful to others or the kinds that can potentially make a change in the lives of others, even if they have a silly lesson to it or if they make you laugh [because I am that funny. no]. I have left some of my “best” work public as well [rated on the “comment and liking” count of viewers and on every time I LOL whilst reading them myself]. Anyway, that was just a small update on how I will be managing this blog from now on till the end of its existence [managing…lol].

Now to the good stuff. So for a good chunk of this year, my life has been…annoying. But, Alhumdulilah, I have reached the end of it. OMG, its almost 2014!!! [I actually just realized hah]. BTW, I will be having a ‘Farewell 2014’ post up, which yes, will be protected. And, if you people are dying [GOD forbid] to read it, send me an email and I will give you the password [but first I dare you to figure it out yourself]. So, about this post, which is being written right now this very second, well not for you of course, ah, k im done. its not really about my life entirely. It is about you…us…everyone who thinks they are “doing the right thing” or wants to. Its about that good person in you that is trying to make you a better person and trying to help those around you to be better people, no matter how hard it is.

I know that its hard to stop something that is wrong and to straighten things out. But, when it is, you should go for it, because it does really matter at the end…you know, like when you have to stand there waiting to be judged with your book in your hand [the Right hand InShaAllah]. Wow, thats scary. The harder it is to stop the wrong, the more reward [If God wills]. There have been instances where I had to be that person who tells a friend, a sibling, a special person, or even my parents that what they are doing is wrong or that they should do something other than that. Its really hard. It hurts when these people then get annoyed at you for saying such things and they make you feel guilty of how you are a “goody two-shoes” [I never understood that analogy, but it still hurts…weird]. Then all those moments and memories stir past you and you feel like a hypocrite and what not…ahhhhhh. At the end of the day, you know that God knew your intentions and no matter how mad or annoyed those people get at you, you did the right thing.

I am writing this stuff because in the past year, I had a friend who I thought was one way and who I thought was this “person”, but turns out that the words did not match the actions. I mean even if something was done, I didn’t know. How am I supposed to know what was going on? I wanted and even now want something to happen or have continued, but the words of others don’t match yours that person’s. Idk who is right and who is lying. I have come to a point where I can no longer trust that friend…is it me that is wrong? I have no idea…I think its because nothing is being done. So, you can see why this is an issue…I do not stand for lying. Why, because it is wrong. And lying is a sin. So, no matter how good of a person someone trys to be, and if they still lie, they can not be a good person. So, coming back to the title of this post, don’t do drugs do the right thing and don’t be silent about the wrong. Try to stop it, make it right, even if you have to drop your pride and apologize to who ever got hurt because of the people you know who did/said wrong. In other words, don’t be a wuss.

Oh, and we made smores!

Honey graham crackers, vegan marshmallows (or Halal ones), Any chocolate. Heat in oven for God knows how long. Eat!

Honey gram crackers, vegan marshmallows (or Halal ones), Any chocolate. Heat in oven for God knows how long. Eat!

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Guest Post #3

We all like clothes right? …so why go out with barely none!? (haha. I’m so funny. JK) Anyway, this is a guest post [durf, it says it in the title]. In all seriousness, I have noticed this to be a huge topic on everyone’s mind… so much so that it frustrates me. Kinda. But, people are people, even though sometimes they turn into ‘annoying’ people. I should stop typing…take it away Sana!
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Modesty

Growing up in a western society, it is almost impossible for one to ignore all the flaunting half naked female super models. Boldness is now the new beauty. At least that’s what the media says. We’ve become so desensitized to seeing nudity in the fashion magazines that we no longer stop to think or question its affects on our lives, on our kids and our households. Our youth reveres these personalities so much that they want to emulate them completely. Generally, covering is considered old fashioned. Glamour magazines are being used as “holy texts” because the pressure on women and young teens to look a certain way is immense. Every woman wants to be like the girl in the magazine-the good, curvy, lusciously beautiful female. And women who do choose to dress modestly remain nameless and voiceless; usually viewed as people who have no sense of fashion and yet to experience or taste freedom, in essence desperate to be liberated.

Many of you reading this would probably have a different opinion than me when I say this, but why idolize women that haven’t done anything significant with their lives? Why not put the women, who’ve made significant contributions to the society, and who have complete control over their bodies, on the pedestals? As someone who spent her entire life in this country, I can relate to the experiences of our young Muslim sisters who often wonder where to turn to when in need of Muslim women who they can use as role models. A lot of women think that in order to be successful they must compromise their hijab, and many to a great extent have been affected by this sort of attitude. I came across an article recently which had been published during the New York Fashion Week. The article was about an American Muslim woman, Nzinga Knight, a fashion designer. In her article, she discussed the issues that concern the women in the west today, especially Muslim women. She made some very beautiful and logical points. One of which was that women in the western society think that they are liberated when in reality they are not because they aren’t standing on their feet based on their merit. The only reason they’ve come so far is because they have been doing away with their clothes. I agree with her. Usually, when fashion designers create innovative styles, they have one thing in mind and that is to make the catwalks as voluptuous as possible-creating designs that expose the back and cleavage. Nzinga knight, however, ended up doing something different. She introduced a modest way of dressing through her designs. She says in her article that “…sensuality isn’t always a public display of your skin.” Isn’t this a perfect example for all us Muslim sisters to boast our morale and help us to continue to follow the path of dressing modestly? This is a modern day example of a successful Muslim woman who carries religion in one hand and the world in the other. She’s seemed to have survived without compromising anything. So why can’t we?

Historically, I can recall another great Muslim woman who can be of a great role model for us Muslim sisters. Syeda Khadijah (may Allah be well pleased with her), the first wife of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him). Syeda Khadijah (may Allah be well pleased with her) was a daughter of a wealthy trader by the name of Khuwaylid hence the name Khadijah binte Khuwaylid. Being born in the pre-Islamic era and being raised in a male chauvinistic society, Bibi Khadijah was already ahead of her time. The first Women’s Rights convention was held 1848, but Syeda Khadijah was running a successful trading business long before that. She was not only revered for being the first business lady, but also known for her exceedingly generous attitude towards the less fortunate and the orphans. She sought out to help the poor and needy especially young unmarried girls. She helped with the marriages of girls who were of poor descent and provided for them the dowry. She was referred to as the “princess of Quaraysh” because she was so wealthy. Syeda Khadijah (may Allah be well pleased with her) was deeply dedicated to Islam and always expressed gratitude towards Allah. She scarified all of her wealth for the survival of Islam and always stood by her husband’s side. Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) did not take him a second wife for as long as Syeda Khadijah (may Allah be well pleased with her) lived. All Praise is to Allah, the Al mighty for giving us such a beautiful woman in Islam to revere. Syeda Khadijah is perfect example of how a woman should be. She was a complete woman.
The list of famous historical as well as present day successful Muslim women goes on if one actually makes an effort to look for them. My sisters in Islam- let us look for these women, study them and embody their roles into our lives and be the beautiful creation of Allah that he wants us to be. This is not at all an attack on anyone who chooses to not dress modestly. Below is a link/video I’d like to share with all of you. It will add power to my words.

-Sana Khawar
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Ok, I am back. LOL. Hope you read through all of it…its pretty short actually, but very informative, I thought so. Sana Khawar also wrote another guest post here on yours truly’s [idk] blog. If you got distracted by the link in the very begining of this post, you might have been directed there. You are welcome. And here is another guest post…Check it out. And here is the page where you can find my guest posts I wrote on other people’s blogs. You better check them out [thats a bit harsh..eh watevs].

If you want me to guest post on your blog or website…I will love to do it!!! [please? I love guest posting and give me a topic] Also, if you want to be cool and guest post on my blog, I would LOVE that. It can be any appropriate topic and an image/video/whatever else would be nice with it. Just TELL ME [via comment or email, which is in one of the tabs/pages above this blog. [fine, its “herenownotforeva.gmail.com”].

Peace out, tell your mom I said hi. -eva626

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Private and Confidential

There was a point in my life where I had to change a few of my posts to private because I had tracked down a stalker. But I think I scared him/her away LOL. Sorry if you are still here. Now everything on this blog is public. I always had issues with sharing my personal life with people, be it family, friends, teachers, you guys, people on my Facebook and Twitter…yea. I love being anonymous here because at least I can share my general thoughts that might have to do something with the real me, without anyone actually knowing who I am. It might confuse some people because they don’t know my past or present. I am  fine with that. The main reason I blog is to waste time write out what I am thinking about without expecting advice from people. I just want someone to listen sometimes, even if it is you, who I don’t even know. Sometimes i feel that bloggers are more real than the real people I know.

Problems with sharing things with certain types of people:

-Parent: I tried this actually and sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn’t. The problem with this is that parents do care, a lot, but they care too much. They will make a big deal about it because they care for you A LOT. If you don’t like their response, you should just keep quiet and ponder on why they answered in such a way. There is always a good reason because they care A WHOLE LOT. lol. And so this leads them to tell the older child…aka my nemesis sister [LOL a bit exaggerated]; this makes me uncomfortable.

-Friend: I don’t have any friends.

LOL joking. This here is also a problem…well, it kinda depends on what kind of a friend they are. If they are the opposite gender type of friend, they will think you are crazy. Don’t share your girl feelings with guys and viceversa. Biology makes it so that the other wont really understand what you are feeling. Of course there are exceptions, but to stay on the safe side…I would pass. Also, I am a girl [haha I know] and telling friends who are females doesn’t help. They’d just nod and agree with you, which isn’t a good thing because you are still stuck in the dilemma.

image

Sometimes I need to be alone with a mug of chai.

-Relative: Don’t do it, even if they are your cousins, because your story will definitely reach other people. First, it will be transferred to their close cousins, then their mom’s, who are most probably your mom’s sister, and then your mom will know…. None the less before your mom knows it will reach every Raza.com member around the world.

-Sibling: Some of us have really close ties with our siblings or a particular one, so its easy to spill the beans (purposely) and share your issues. But then there are families like mine, where we cringe when one of us shares their inner thoughts. The environment that some cultures have created is so messed up. You can’t share anything personal with your siblings. It might be because the headline will reach the parents or because you might just be too embarrassed, since your dealing with serious critics. But we trust our siblings more than others; the good thing here is that what happens in the neutral family stays inside. This might be the second best option after the last one below.

-Blog: Its simple, but sometimes indirect. Its kinda risky though, since if someone catches on, they might be offended. You shouldn’t want to offend people. So, think, think, write, re-read, think, then publish.

-The one you can always trust is God.